


You Fill Me Up

by Casey_K



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Consensual Kink, Dark, Emotional Baggage, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, Fanfiction, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multiple Partners, Not Suitable/Safe For Work, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sex Club, not for the faint hearted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-28
Updated: 2015-01-28
Packaged: 2018-03-09 09:31:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3244658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Casey_K/pseuds/Casey_K
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve is messed up, and Danny gets that. Danny will do anything to help him out even when it hurts. But this time Danny finally understands a little more...and it's all okay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Fill Me Up

**Author's Note:**

> This is a difficult one. There may be triggers hiding, but there is absolutely no non-con or dub-con, just a lot of messed up sex. I've tagged it for kink, but it's so much more than that. If you think there should be other tags...let me know, thanks.
> 
> Don't own them  
> Not beta'd
> 
> Just one possible way Steve may deal with his demons.

Danny loved Steve. There was no doubt in his mind, he was all out head over heels, do anything in the world for the stupid great lug. And oddly enough, despite their current situation, Danny knew Steve loved him exactly the same way and that was why Danny was learning to make peace with the one thing—one of many things, but the one really big, huge, defining, thing—that was important to Steve’s state of mind but that Danny just didn’t get. 

Steve had been through a lot of shit in his life. Steve had created a lot of shit in his life. Danny suspected that parts of Steve were irreparably damaged but if having Danny’s support with this one thing helped Steve live a pretty normal life 95% of the time, then Danny would give him that support even if it tore him up inside. 

It was hot and humid, darker than it needed to be, and the music thudded in the background—if you could call it music—and Danny could already feel the disconnect. Not from Steve, never from Steve, but from what was going on around them. Danny grounded himself against Steve’s body and flicked the switch in his mind to send himself into practical mode. Get it done, then they could go back to normal for another month or so before that haunted look would start to cloud Steve’s eyes and they’d be booking a plane ticket to the mainland and yet another city where no one knew who they were or what they did for a living. 

So, Danny rubbed a hand over Steve’s back in reassurance. Steve always needed lots of reassurance that this was okay, that this need he wasn’t strong enough to fight wouldn’t push Danny away from him. That they would pick up and get on with their life together as soon as it had passed. 

Steve groaned particularly loudly. Danny was sure he would have too if the situation were reversed. The cock pounding into Steve’s abused hole was huge. And it was his sixth so far in the current fuck-Steve-free-for-all session. Steve reached back to grab Danny’s thigh and whimpered. 

“You gonna suck me while I’m waiting?” The next guy in line for Steve’s ass pointed his cock at Danny. Danny was straddling Steve’s hips, facing his ass, and holding his cheeks open for the guy fucking. Danny was fully clothed. He stared at the guy and tried not to communicate his disgust at the thought. 

“No,” he managed to say in a civil tone. “I’m just the handler. If you suit it up, he’ll suck you, keep you hard while you’re waiting.”

The guy rolled on a condom but just as he thought about moving around to plug Steve’s mewling throat, donkey-cock shuddered and stilled. When he pulled his cock out of Steve’s ass, it stayed open and stretched. Danny gave it a cursory once over to make sure there was no damage and Steve would be okay to continue and then the freshly suited impatient cock pushed straight in, one long, hard thrust taking him balls deep. Cock number seven in the hour since Danny had spread Steve’s cheeks and declared him open house. 

For a brief moment, Danny allowed himself to wonder how long it would be this time and how many cocks Steve would take before he signalled Danny to say he’d had enough, and it was time to go home. And then Danny shut it out of his mind and reverted to the practicalities, ignoring the smell and sound of sex all around him, and the love of his life being ploughed by strangers bucking beneath him. He didn’t get it. Any of it. But for Steve, he’d learn to live with it the same way he’d learned to love Hawaii for Grace.

OoOoOoO

There was a hint of cinnamon and a heavy scent of coffee on the air as they walked into the coffee shop for brunch. A simple thing that turned into a defining moment…for Danny at least. It was a time that allowed Danny to really understand that Steve’s need to be fucked till he couldn’t stand up by as many strangers as he could take really had nothing to do with Danny’s lack of anything, or Steve’s ability to commit. It had been bound to happen. You couldn’t fuck that many people and not bump into one of them eventually. But, and this was the defining moment for Danny, Steve was oblivious. 

The coffee shop was reasonably quiet so they couldn’t hide. Steve was walking very carefully as they made their way to the counter to order but had still taken in their surroundings and surveyed every customer for potential level of threat, so Danny was surprised that Steve didn’t recognise the guy sat next to the till watching them intently. 

“I’ll order,” Steve said. “You find a seat.” He grimaced. “Cushion for me if there is one.”

Danny turned towards a quiet corner but the guy raised a hand to Danny. “Will you join me?” Danny shrugged and pulled one of the softer chairs up to the table for Steve. The guy raised an eyebrow. 

“He won’t be walking straight for at least a day or two.” It was a strange thing to say to someone you didn’t know, but there was no point pretending Danny hadn’t recognised him.

“I’m not surprised,” the guy said. He didn’t smile, but his tone was light. “How many in the end?”

Danny shrugged. “Twenty, twenty-five, I think. I lose count.” Thirty-two. Danny never lost count. Ever. He wore each one like a pinhole in his heart. 

“How long were you there?” The guy was kind enough not to insist on eye contact. He’d already looked down at the table and was shuffling coasters around. 

“Three hours.” _Felt more like three days._ Danny shrugged again. “Usually it’s not that long.”

“Usually?”

“It’s a regular thing. He’s usually had enough after about an hour. We’ve had a bad month.” Too many fucking lunatics stirring up nightmares of god only knew what in Steve’s messed up head. Danny hated it. Hated them for leaving Steve so…vulnerable.

“You don’t seem so keen.”

Danny sighed and leaned back against his chair. No point pretending with that either. “He needs me to be okay with it.”

The guy nodded and the look showed he understood on some level. 

“Who’s your friend?” Steve’s tone was clipped and possessive and Danny was about to give Steve hell until he realised Steve didn’t recognise the bloke at all despite having spent a good fifteen minutes the evening before (if Danny remembered correctly, and he was sure he had because the other guys waiting had started to get restless) with the man’s cock pounding into his ass. 

“Um, this is…”

“David.” The guy smiled and held out his hand to Steve who grabbed it firmly. 

“How do you know Danny?”

“Us, Steve,” Danny said. Steve looked at Danny with a blank expression. “He knows _us_.” Still nothing. “Because he’s one of the guys who fucked you yesterday.”

Steve dropped David’s hand quickly, and flushed. “Sorry, I uh…”

“It’s okay,” David said, managing a smile. “We weren’t exactly introduced.”

They chatted casually over coffee even though Steve was constantly fidgeting and obviously in some discomfort. David was passing through on business. Frequented clubs like the one they’d met in all over the country on a monthly basis to let off steam. He was single, recently so, and wasn’t looking for anything permanent. He was a decent enough guy. Tall, well built around the shoulders and not bad looking. A bit average for Danny’s taste, especially sat next to Steve, but Danny could appreciate the button down and slacks. He was wearing jeans himself, and it was unusual enough that they felt scratchy and stiff against his skin. 

Danny watched Steve talk. The bags under his eyes were pronounced from lack of quality sleep and his body never fully came to rest. There was always a part of him moving, whether a foot tapping, a knee jiggling—although he was being sparing with that one today—fingers stroking over Danny’s thigh.

“So,” Danny said, feeling a tight knot in his stomach about what he was about to do. It wasn’t their usual thing but Danny had known last night that despite the three hours of fucking Steve still had tension remaining and he didn’t want to be back on a plane in two weeks because the demons were calling. “You uh, want to fuck him again, David? Now?”

“Danny,” Steve gasped. 

Danny looked over at Steve and sighed. “You either want me to hand you out like a party favour or you don’t. We’re still away and you are still itching for action, I can read it in your body. Let me do what I’m here to do and take care of you.” Danny ran a finger over Steve’s cheek and Steve lowered his gaze and nodded once.

David looked intrigued. “Okay. We can go to my hotel room.”

“Okay, let’s go.” Danny stood, eager to get it over with.

“Will you be part of the deal, today?” 

“Absolutely not,” Steve said with a growl. 

“Just wanted to be sure,” David said, raising his hand in a placating gesture as Steve pulled himself up to his full height. David turned back to Danny. “I’m happy to suck you off while I fuck your boy. It’s the least I can do.”

_My boy, yeah right._ Danny managed to hold back the scoff. “I appreciate the offer, but it won’t be necessary.” They followed David out of the coffee shop and Danny made sure to keep his hand on Steve just to reassure him and let him know it was okay. 

OoOoOoO

Steve’s hole was red, swollen, and stayed slightly enlarged after the first finger Danny put in. Steve hissed and Danny took out the special lube with numbing and antiseptic properties. “Danny,” Steve whispered. Danny leaned down to kiss Steve’s lips tenderly. “You don’t have to do this.”

“Yes, I do. And I’ll keep doing it until you don’t need it anymore because I need you. Are you ready?” Steve nodded once. Danny slapped his ass hard and Steve winced. “Good, now spread your legs and take David’s cock. And if you don’t take it like you mean it I’m going to pimp your fucking ass on the street corner.” He grinned, and a slow, uncertain smile spread across Steve’s face.

Danny had forgotten David was the guy with the donkey-cock. It took several attempts for him to get fully inside Steve without Steve trying to crawl away from him. In the end, Danny had to pin Steve down so David could make it balls deep. Steve squirmed and wriggled but finally stilled and took the pounding with a resigned contentment. Slowly, slowly, Steve started to release the last of the tension curled in his muscles. When David was done, Danny flipped Steve onto his back and fucked his throat while David sucked Steve off. Steve came with a strangled cry around Danny dick that pushed him over the edge. 

Danny was glad they’d decided to go to their own hotel because Steve was in no shape to go anywhere. David kindly ran a bath while Danny stroked Steve’s forehead and temples, whispered sweet nothings, and placed tender kisses to calm and reassure. Steve, finally, was completely out of it. 

“You’re law enforcement,” David said suddenly, making Danny startle. Danny looked up to see David staring at Danny’s badge. _Shit_. He looked at David, ready to make excuses. “I’m FBI,” he said quickly. “Based in DC.” He handed Danny his ID. “I guess we can keep this discreet?”

“Please.” Danny felt sick. He couldn’t believe he’d been stupid enough to leave his badge on show, even if they hadn’t been expecting to bring anyone back to the room. “We’re a long way from home for exactly that reason.”

David took back his ID and handed Danny a card. “I’ll fuck him again. If you want. No attachment, nothing personal, just helps to know it’s safe.”

Danny nodded. “I’ll let you know when and where we head to next time.” 

“What about you? Are you really okay?” His tone was genuine and Danny started to relax a little. It was hard sometimes, he didn’t like to burden Steve with his misgivings, but he needed to unload and there was nobody he could trust with something so monumental. It was nice to be asked, and good to know it was as safe as it was ever going to be to answer honestly. 

“Actually, I’m good.” He picked up his badge and ran his fingertips over the engraving. “I get it now,” he said, looking back at David. “Or at least I can see it isn’t about us, isn’t about me not being enough. I always knew, believed him when he said it wasn’t about sex, but now I see it.”

“What changed?”

“You.” Danny placed his badge back on the table and sat next to Steve, still out of it on the bed. He stroked a hand over Steve’s hair. “When he didn’t know you. I’m sure it wasn’t very nice for you, but for me,” Danny smiled, “it felt really good.”

“Actually, I was relieved too. I’m always worried I’ll end up having to arrest one of the guys I’ve fucked in a club. It’s a relief to know I’m just a faceless cock. And to be honest, I wouldn’t have recognised him.” David gestured to Steve. “It was you I recognised. If you hadn’t have told him I fucked him, I wouldn’t have been sure it was him.” 

That was also good to know. Danny knew Steve worried about being recognised. He’d be able to let Steve know now, that just as the men who fucked him were faceless to him, he was just a faceless hole to them. 

“You want to stay for a beer?” Danny asked. David looked unsure, but nodded once. “Let me put him in the bath, first.”

A few moments later, when Danny was sure Steve wouldn’t fall asleep and drown _(I’m a SEAL Danny, SEAL’s don’t drown)_ , Danny sat at the table next to David and handed him a beer. “So why do you do it?”

David sighed. “He’s ex-military, isn’t he?”

“I’m asking about you.”

“I am too. Special Forces. Been all over. Got caught up in shit no man 1``` should ever see.”

Danny’s heart clenched. He knew that was why Steve was the way he was and all of a sudden he wasn’t sure how much more of David’s story he wanted to hear.

“It’s not like sex,” David said, twirling his beer bottle. “At least not like why most people have sex. There’s no connection to the other person. It’s about losing yourself to the sensations in your body. It’s about disconnecting from everything but the feeling in your flesh. No thoughts, no expressive emotions. Everything else bleeds into the background,” David met Danny’s gaze, “including the nightmares. Including the flash backs, and the memories of the things you’ve done, things you’ve seen.”

“I figured as much.”

“He’s lucky to have you.” David continued to fiddle with his beer bottle. “My wife didn’t understand. She…” he sighed. “She tried to. She understood I needed to let off steam, but when she realised I was fucking men.” He shook his head. “She thought I was trying to get back to…she thought I’d been fucking half my unit, and that I was missing them, would rather have them then her.”

“And were you?” Danny was asking as much for himself, wondering if Steve had fucked his team.

David shook his head. “Never did, not one. Not even a handjob. I hooked up with a couple of guys from other units over the years to let off steam. Less than five in fifteen years. No fucking, just getting each other off. I’ve always used clubs to fuck.”

“You ever put yourself on the receiving end?”

“Once or twice. I prefer it actually, the disconnect is quicker for me that way, but it isn’t…sensible, unless you have someone looking out for you.” David snorted. “Like I said, he’s lucky.”

“I could do it for you too.” David looked up at Danny, obviously shocked. “As long as Steve is okay with it. Next time we go, I’ll be the handler for both of you.”

“Is that your way of asking to fuck me?”

“No.” Danny gave a dry laugh. “I don’t want to fuck you. I don’t even want to be your friend. No offense. But, I can see you need what he needs and if it helps you to be a better FBI Agent, keeps you out of the rafters, keeps you safe, then I’ll do it.”

David placed his empty beer bottle on the table and stood to leave. “Ask him, when it’s appropriate and let me know. I’ll need at least two to three weeks’ notice most of the time.” He paused before closing the door behind him. “And thanks, it’s…I appreciate the offer.”

Danny drained the last of his beer. He stood to go to the bathroom and check on Steve, only to find Steve leaning against the doorframe. “How are you feeling?”

“Better.” Steve didn’t smile. “Back to as normal as I ever get apart from the raw ass.”

“So we’re okay to head home?” Danny wasn’t sure, because Steve was never this quiet after he’d let go of the crap. He was affectionate and sweet. It was a time Danny looked forward to. But this Steve was thrumming with a different kind of tension. “You heard?”

“You want to…” Steve rubbed a hand over his face. “Am I losing you, Danny? Because we don’t have to do this. I’ll manage. I did before. I can’t risk losing you.”

Danny went to him, wrapped him up in a tender embrace. “Never going to happen. I’m in it for the long haul, Steven. Whatever it takes. I’m okay with this, I really am.”

“But you want to…for him. Why would you want to?”

Danny held on to Steve, not wanting to break the contact that would allow Steve to feel the truth of Danny’s words. “I just figured if I could help another member of law enforcement keep a handle on life, it’d be a good thing.”

“He’s law enforcement?”

“FBI out of DC. I’m not replacing you, Steve. As if I ever could. He’s ex-Special Forces. I was going to ask you what you thought about it.”

Steve stroked over Danny’s shoulder and Danny could feel the thoughts tumbling around upstairs in Steve’s head. “You wouldn’t mind travelling with a guy who fucked me, twice?”

“Hardly.” Danny chuffed out a laugh. “You didn’t even recognise him.”

Steve pushed back from Danny and looked into his eyes. “But knowing he’s had me.”

“Only because I let him.” Not ideal, but one of the only ways Danny had learned to deal with the whole fucking mess, because he knew Steve would go without if he asked him to, and he would struggle on through and try to keep it together for Danny, and that’s why Danny had to do it, allow it, for him. Because Steve…along with Grace…was his everything.

“You realise that’ll make you a pimp with two boys?” Steve tried to hide the smirk. 

“I’m just that good.”

“Then I’m okay with it too.”

“And you’re not saying that because you want his huge cock again?”

“It is huge,” Steve grimaced. “Not much fun to be honest, but it did the job.”

“That’s good, because if I’m pimping his ass, he won’t be fucking you.” Danny pulled Steve back into his arms.

“And you really aren’t interested in trying him out?” Steve asked, resting his head on Danny’s.

“I can honestly say I didn’t even consider it. You know me Steve, I only want you.” Danny squeezed a little. 

“And if that ever changes, you’ll tell me first, right?”

“If I get taken over by some personality altering gizmo that changes my sexual proclivity I will let you know first.”

Steve nuzzled against Danny’s hair. “I love you, Danno. I’m sorry I’m not in a condition where you can fuck me to show you I mean it.”

“No,” Danny smiled, “but you can fuck me.” Their lips met, hands wandered, and it wasn’t long before Danny’s ass felt as full as his heart.

**Author's Note:**

> I've got outlines for another episode where 5-0 need to call in the FBI, and of course David is the idea contact. I'm not sure what I wanted to see from David coming to Hawaii. Waiting for the muse to strike.


End file.
